Coming to an end

Because I’m avoiding packing, I figured now, during my last few days here, I would take the time to reflect on my experience in Arizona.

I came out here for the sole purpose of a job. I didn’t know anything about Arizona except for heat, desert, and cacti. Boy was I sheltered. Coming from the east coast, Florida was the place for retirees. I never knew Arizona was a snow-bird, golfing state. I love the dry heat (no frizzy hair) and moutains. I’m a huge scenery person and I love seeing the palm trees, sunshine and mountains. One of my regrets is not hiking one of the mountains out here but I overcame plenty of other obstacles or “mountains” during my time here.

Some people may come out here for the weather but I did not. I’m a people person, and while I met some great and some not so great people at work, I failed to meet people outside of work. I commend any person who moves to a new city and creates an entire life outside of their job. I believe that was one of the downsides of my experience out here. I was so consumed and wrapped up in work that I couldn’t get away because work was where my friends were. Living alone didn’t help much and I’m not the type to go to a bar by myself but hey at least my neighbors were nice.

Some of the not so nice people that I’ve met, cough Ursula cough cough, have showed me that no matter what, I need to remain positive. During my extreme boredness at work these past couple if day, I’ve observed her and I’ve concluded she is just an unhappy person but I don’t feel bad for her. I believe happiness is a choice and there are many reasons to be happy. However, some people sabotage their own happiness for attention, pity, affection, etc. No matter how much I hated work or my job or being so far away from family or having no friends, I always tried to remain positive and happy. I can thank my close support system for not letting me choose to be miserable or unhappy. Just remember, there’s always a silver lining to a bad situation and if there isn’t, make one.

For my friends at work, especially my sister-from-another-mister, I thank you and appreciate you. You put up with my moods, vents, smiles, and so much more. I cannot thank you enough for helping my get through this experience. However, I feel like you never got to know the real down to earth, happy go lucky me because I just hated life at work. I hope I made an good impression on you as a positive person, despite the negative situation. I also cannot thank my parents enough. They were my sanity during this experience. Distance really made me not only appreciate them more but maybe-possibly-kinda-ish love them more? You all and even Ursula have taught me something whether it was about “the office” and its politics, policies, and pros (and cons), enlighten me on west coast culture, or just a new lesson or experience.

Among those lessons, I’ve learned that the people that you work with play a MAJOR role in whether you like your work or not. I’ve learned about professionalism, how to handle certain situations such as conflict, and how to balance work and home, all of which I will continue to build and grow. I’ve also learned that I value honesty, communication, consistency, and structure in a company. I’ve learned some of what I like and what I don’t like when it comes to a job and workplace, that I can be independent and not live within driving distance of my parents, and no matter what, to be true to yourself. I’m removing myself from a toxic environment for my own happiness and growth.

The biggest thing I’m taking away from this experience is (as corny and cliche as it is), “believe in yourself.” I felt like this experience was a constant battle to see if I could be broken and beat down. I mustered my confidence, found an outlet (my writing), and leaned on friends and family, and got through this “battle.” I believed in my talents and took pride in my work and no one, not even Ursula, can take that away from me. There will always be people trying to tear you down but the big word in that phrase is “trying.” Never let them win. Stand up and believe in yourself.

That’s why in the long run, I know I’ve won.